From the beginning of time, men have needed a box – a box to put their junk in (pun most indeededly intended). Due to primal and uncontrollable instincts that come with manhood, men feel the need to display their loot to all who will look.
The answer to this need is simple: The Modern Man MUST have a cufflink box to display his cufflinks in, as you will soon come to understand with the following 3 reasons all Modern Men need a cufflink box.
Reason 1 to own a cufflink box: Modern Men have TOO MUCH SPACE on their dresser / bedside table / elaborate mantel piece with a bust carved into it of themselves looking triumphantly towards an incoming horde of Zombies.
The modern man doesn’t like it at all when the surfaces of his room are not occupied with manly items displaying his loot. He would rather fill his dresser, bedside table and mantel surfaces with troll dolls, One Direction singles and cufflink boxes. No need to have a clean space ready for more important things, like Oscar awards and the latest Apple products; a cufflink box out classes everything.
Reason 2 to own a cufflink box: Modern Men love breaking things, or losing things and blaming it on their significant other
If something isn’t broken, the day is not complete, so the Modern Man feels compelled to throw his cufflinks into a cufflink box. Perhaps he will chip or damage them in some way so that he can feel manlier. If this doesn’t work, I would advise people in the general vicinity to move slowly away. Don’t mention that you recorded over his ballet recital at this stage, leave it for later.
After depositing his cufflinks in the cufflink box, the Modern Man will promptly lose one in the myriad of other cufflinks. There is no doubt that the lost cufflink will be his significant others fault, which will cause a heated argument and potentially separation, divorce, and loneliness to be worn like a cape of pride for the Modern Man.
Reason 3 to own a cufflink box: Modern Men need to lift heavy things
When Modern Men travel, as their high paced and ‘highly’ paid job will require, they will need a bag as heavy as possible to display their manliness. This bag will include all work gear required for their travel – suits, comically large alarm clock, shirts, ties, comically small condoms, shoes and cufflinks. The Modern Man carries his cufflinks in a cufflink box to ensure that they are in the heaviest vessel possible for travel, which will increase the weight of his bag and hence increase his manliness. It also comes with the possibility to damage or to lose cufflinks bouncing around in the box as mentioned in Reason 2, killing two stones with one bird. Modern Men love killing stones.
A man needs a cufflink box to display and store his cufflinks in, as this is how it has always been done, which means it is the best way it can be done. Unless you have a Jack Straps Cufflink Strap.
Let me know what you think in the comments!